I’ve had this conflicting feeling for such a long time now and it has been the most confusing thing to try and comprehend. It’s something I can’t express in so many words so I thought of trying to phrase it differently, so without further ado, here’s my poem.
Before the days that I met you
I was certain that you were blue.
For you would be:
an ocean of sadness that comes in waves,
like raindrops that fall and race down my face
A feeling so prominent, I couldn’t escape
But now that we’ve met
I no longer think this way.
For now I see that you’re contradicting;
a conflicting feeling
of contentment and dissatisfaction,
of silence and interaction.
You’ve made a mess of me
eating away at my sanity,
And every time I think I’m free
You pull me back like gravity.
It’s impossible to be happy
When you’re the black hole inside of me.
I’ve been taken captive in your darkness,
Where all I feel is emptiness
But now I realise what this is,
You are the feeling of loneliness.